Friday, July 29, 2011


i scared him last nite stupid me feel asleep and my phone was on vibrate didnt here it he freaked out got scared and walked down to my house my dad let him in i didnt mean to scare him i really didnt

he thought something happened to me cause i wasnt answering he thought it was soemthing bad he said he was happy i was sleeping but i have to have my phone on teh loudest setting for he can get in touch of me

he said what if u got in accident? what if soemthing happened? what if i(he) was far away and coudlnt get in touch with me

i feel bad for scaring him so much

im still a manaic mess idk what to think or what to do i cant wrap my head around nething i feel like im crawling out of my skin i feel myself gettign fatter and fatter and all i want i smy pills back and my scale i wanna cut to make it all stop what do i do how do i beat this on my own how do i not throw away everything i love im so confused

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