Friday, September 30, 2011

pics pics

sorry bout all the posts today im jsut trying to get in as many updates as i can while i have computer access

k pics i have my back which was taken last nite then the 2 laying donw ones this morning

doc appt

had my follow up with my gastro doc today hes such a nice guy nuttin showed up on my test but he cheked my stomach and my heart neway so i offically have IBS. no more taking nexium cause its not working he said no point in u to take it he says i have to try and sleep more and hes doesnt like how skinny i am im like i cant eat hes like u dont eat im like it hurts to much and we were talking more he wants me on meds for anxiety and depression and on them asap cause they take bout month to work so im gonna go get my blood wokr done for cholestrol on monday then make an appt with family doc about that and to get meds for anxiety and depression. and he also thinks i have fibromyalgia so gotta talk about that to the doc too

so i guess ive been offiically dianoges with anxiety and depression or have idk does my family doc have to diagnose me or does my gastor doc counts he wants me ont eh meds asap cause it takes bout month to work so guys if ur on anxiety or depression meds or both let me know how they are ne kind that u like the most and srsly how much do they cost


does neone know nething about computers please if u do help me im on my bros right now and i have to use the downstiars one when no1 is home for i can go on ehre and my site and sd it suchs not having a computer

but back to my issues um lets c it was fine wednesday morning b4 work nuttin seemed wrong i have an HP i never turn it off unless to restart it to do the updates when im done wiht it i just close it and it goes to sleep its usually alwasy plugged in as well sometimes i unplug it cuase of the rain cause my ceiling leaks but it smonlsty plugged in well i went to go on it yesterday morining i plugged itin the nite b4 cause iw as gonna go on but never got to it and it poured if u live in new jersey u know what i mean it poured poured and mine ceiling leaks but everything else that was plugged into the electric cord thing is fine but neway i went to go on it yesterday and nuttin its on but the screen stays black i turned it off multiple times still same thing turns on no screen i turned it off kept the battery out all day got home from work nearly 9 hours later tried it still nuttin bro researched tried different things taking battery out plugging it in turning it on, hittting the shift key, holding the power button for 40 seconds, hitting f5 and even putting a fan out it for ahile just in case it was over heated and nuttin it still turns on but the screen still stays black so does neone have ne idea what coudl b wrong with it and ne idea how i can fix it its only 2 yrs old.

so right now im on my bros hes lets me power it when hes not using it and hes at work and im not ause i have my follow up gastro appt and an eye doc appt and i go onthe downstairs one when no one is home cause privacy sucks in this place everyone is alwasy looking over ur shoulder ugh

im still sick i still get alot of pain im still weak i still get tired im doing close to 2000 crucnhes a day a move as much as i can at work i weven walk in palce at home to tire to me out it help me sleeps some but im still up by 5am yeah fun times there the boy thinks im nuts i tell him i walk in palce at home hes like y dont u just go tot he gym after work but i cant the gym is to busy by then so he gets that u know

i cant wera bras nemore they hurt and they dont fit nemore nemore so i bought a shit ton os camis with teh built in bra so i wear those the boy says i have to eat more and i have been but it just hurts hurts hurts so much

i snuck into mas room today while she wasnt home weighed myself 103 with wet hair and towel 102 with out towel but still wet hair so howmuch weight does wet hair add i was just otu of the shower it was soaked and its just under my shoulders so im guessing im around 100-101 lbs god i want double digits so bad

i have a good pic of my back but its on my phone and i cant get it off of it sicne i dont have my laptop so ugh

but i got my ahir cut the other day got 2 inches cut off layers int he back angles int he front and my bangs thicker i alwasy get a lecture wheni go cause i dont like to go much i hate the mirrors and the attention its ugh shes like ur hairs so dry u need a deep conditoning and different products yeah lik i have the money for that shes like u shoudl get a cut like every 6 monnths instead of once a year yeah if u say so

i finished reading "passion" lauren kate and "these things hidden" heather gudenkauf

im currently reading " the legend of sleepy hollow" and " the girls guide to homelessness" i recommen then both and the other 2 as well

i will try and get on later to give u update on teh doc appt and eye doc appti treid to read some of ur blogs but u know my computer issues are gonna severly lack me ugh

Saturday, September 24, 2011


what do u guys think?

me and the boy talked last nite. he said that i had to keep on top of the doc make him find out whats wrong cause the pain im in isnt right and i cant live like that nemore. which he is right i know hes right and he said if i can get alil better not ever all the way better just a lil or even just meds to help with all the pain im in were will go on a real vacation next year just me and him we talked bout it going cross country to california san diego to b exact we are gonna talk bout it more and hopefully figure things out

he keeps saying im malnourished idk im eating idk nething nemore ntutin shows up so idk what to think some1 help me figure this out im getting sharp stabbing pains right under my ribs on right side then in the middle of stomach then just in my ribs in general its so bad that i double over in pain and like gasp cause its a shock.

he also told me not to stress bout the job thing i have a job that i get hours in that pays the bills so i shoudlnt stress bout finding a new one.. i was only stressing cause of the insruance thing cause im getting kicked of fmy parents in january when i turn 26. but when i was at the hospital for my test the lady gave me a paper bout how u can come talk to them if ur under insured or not insured at all and they can give u options c what u quailfy for either meidcaid charity care family care i know its the state paying for but if i do that if will help me alot i wont have th epressure of finding a full time job with benefits by january so thats a good thing

i gotta get to the gym soon im disguisted with myself bout what i ate already today but im waiting for my phone to charge and im drinking water cuase i know im dehyradted hence my salt addcition

o my lil cousin turned one on the 20th hes party is the first of october this is what i got him yes i spoil the munchkins what can i say

Friday, September 23, 2011


can some1 please make the pain in my stomach stop already i cant deal with it nemore how can everything come back normal how can i b fine when im in so much pain all the time its just not right its been hurting since yesterday like stabbing pains doubling over in pain pain all on my right side of my stomach i just stand there rubbing it and ppl look at me werid but it hurts and sometimes it makes it feel better so they can deal with it if its not stabbbing pain it feels like some1 is poking me or pricking me ikd ifits my ribs or what but ugh and it was hard to sleep cause of the pain i coudlnt find a postion that didnt hurt im laying on my sotmach right now adn it hurts buti just give up ugh the docs have to find soemthing but im kinda just expecting themt o say im sorry everything came back clear i cant help u nemore ugh

i already did 1,000 crunches today since i gave up on sleeping, took a shower(and it wasnt warm either cause my dad refuses to turnthe hot water up ugh) straighten my hair, bought books on amazon(titles to come) had some apple pie and tea and yeah and its only 930am and im working 12-4 today im just covering the rest of some1 shift for them

ok so book time i got a bunch for my kindle 3 for 99 cents and the rest for free yes free gotta love free books i got

*the return of sherlock holmes
*the memoirs of sherlock holmes
*the jungle book
*beauty and the beast
*grimm's fairy stories
*the art of war
*the legend of sleepy hollow
*the adventures of sherlock holmes
*the abbey
*the mill river recluse
*the tale of despereaux

Thursday, September 22, 2011

pic update

so i took these pics this morning 9/22/11. i dont know my weight and its killing me so if u guys have ane guesses just let me know pease i wish i had my scale i wishi could buy one with otu getting in trouble but neway here are the pics

laying flat

standing up(front view ugh)

side views( my stomach sticks out way to much)

my back

Tuesday, September 20, 2011


so my glabladder test came back nomral i was on my 15 min break and my phone rang so i answered it it was the nurse she said my galbaldder test came back nomral and i just go o ok and shes lie have a good day

its so frustrating so so so frustarting its so hard to deal with and im tired of some ppl telling me thats it my ed that if i just recovered it would b better then im prob just mal noursihed its like they werent listeing to a work i said ever its like fuck off its not my ed its not trust me its not im sick like really phsycally sick not mentally sick but no1 seems to understand that i cant eat nething with out pain everything hurts an dits not my head its real pain its kills my sotmach it kill smy chest my bowles are so messed up im always nasoues the acid is alwasy coming up

and im jsut so fed up wihat is next is he just gonna say im sorry i cant help u i cant hear that nemore i need asnwers i cant even think about recovery right now i just cant cuase how the fuck am i suppose to when everything hurts me when food hurts me its just not reasonable an di know im not being reasonbale in saying this but if theya rent gonna help me ima make them help me if my weight plumments they have no choice but to help me im not gonnna starve im just gonna stop eatin gthe food that cause me so muchpain ive been eating it and dealing witht he pain to keep my weight some what stable but i just cant nemore i need answers idk wath else they can test ive already had blood work(kidney liver pancrass thyroid) cardiologist(echo, ekg, stress test) scope and disida scan what else can they do its just ugh

Monday, September 19, 2011


so its another waiting game guys y do socs alwasy make u wait in suspense and worry and ugh it sucks but neway i have to wait 48 hours to get the results of my disida scan with cck i had today.

the test went good it sucked laying down for 2 hours and not really moving my body started to hurt and my shoulder blades hurt from being pushed onto the table from laying down but all in all it wasnt a bad test i had it done at the hosptial in town and the nurses were relaly nice y cant all my docs b as nice as some of the nurses i have had like realy cuase ive had some great really nice nurses friendly they talk to me make sure im ok and comfortable.

but for the test u lay on a table and the have a cameral over top of ur stomach and undereneth u as well most of the test was laying there with th ecamera until all the images got clear and they could find the galballder in the stomach i did have an iv put in to for i coudl get the meds she had to stick me tiwce and she apoligzed alot for it i kept telling her it was ok but she said so nit wasnt cause i bleed realy good as well. i had on alot of layers: yoga pants, knee high socks, fake ugg boots. tank top, long sleeve shirt, and a hoodie. and she was like wow ur dressed as if its winter im like yeah sorry im alwasy so cold shes like its ok she even got me blankets as well one warm one and then a nomral one on top of that to keep me warm cause the camera and stuff can go thru that. at one point in the middle of the test she came in and asked my weight i said about 100 lbs(cause thats what it was last i knew it) and shes like yeah if that so im guessing i look alot smaller thenw hat i though i was but idk i dont have ascale so i have no idea what my weight is.

the 2nd part of the test is when they give u the cck thru the iv it takes 30 mins for that and she told me to yell if im in pain and she came in and aske dim like its nuttin that imnot used to my stomahc alsways hurts i did get a few sharp pains but i alwasy get those buti didnt get nasouses like some ppl do with the meds so i guess that is a good thing

but all in all the test was 2 hours now i have to wait 48 hours for the results of it
i wore my ring like i alwasy do the promise ring the boy got me years ago for xmas i wear is on my left hand with a simple plain slive one as well and shes like o o let me see omg thats so pretty its gorg whens the date and i just said not for a long time thats what i say to everyone but i also told her its a promise ring but we've been together 8 years neway so we are pratcitally married u know what i mean.

i went to target after i just went for hair clips and starburst but guess what i forget the hair clips lol ha but i did get starburst they were 2 for $4 so got 2 of those and 6 sobe pure waters as well as a 3 pack of gum and to different lean pockets adn ice for my mom.

i went ofr a walk today aobut hour mayb hour and 15 mins and i swang for 5 mins as well i love going ot the park and swining it makes everything better for that lil time the flying thru the air the weightlessness i love it i might go for another walk later after my ipod gets all charged up its a lil chilly but i can handle it well its chilly for me at least u know.

i read and commented on some of ur blogs if i missed some im sorry but im walking avery verythin line right now thats could go either bad or good i could either lose everything or try harder

last week was avery very very rough week for me mentally wise and u have no idea how much i wanted to hurt myself and i had to tell the boy that too cause he told me to tell him when i want to he jsut said i have to b stronger to try and fight it and not do nething stupid but we had a long talk after as well i didnt c him much this weekend and he apologized for that and said hed make it up to me next week were i just kept saying thats its ok he can go out b with hes friends i know u get sick of me and u need a break

and he said that that isnt try at all he could never get sick of me of fed up with dealing with my issues he loves me and he only wants me no matter what that he hates seeing me like this so sad so defeated i had to tell him im tired of life im tired of me and that freaked him out cause he knew what i was saying he knows that if he wasnt there i wouldnt b here my ed would iether kill me or i would do it myself but sincei have him im not gonna kill myself and he knows that and i tell him that

we had a long talk a long talk and some things are personal an di want to keep it that way some tihngs just have to stay between me and him u know what i mean but i told ihm what if i gain weight waht if udont want me nemore and he said i will alasy want me and u dont have to gain weight u dont have to gain 50 lbs 5-10 lbs yes but u dont have to gain alot and not right away and if i can jsut gain it in my ass he would like that very much hes like more for me to hold on too yes hes a typical guy but i love him more then life so yesah but ive never had an ass so im not gonna get one hahahaha

but i dont see the point in everyone having to tell me how skinny i am how im like a twig how i should gain weight i get the gain weight thing at home i hear nurses say how tiny i am i got customers at work just lloking at me and saying omg look how tiny she is how is that righti cant say omg look how fat u are but they can say how skinny i am its so fucke dup and im not that skinny im just not i know my mental health isnt well and i might b small and i just might not c it ijust ug i want it all to stop all of it please just make it all stop

so i either have a choice here i can do what the boy says tyr and be stronger fight it or i can hit rock bottom(which hes scared is gonna happen he asked me if i was) and i said fuck hope i dotn hit rock bottom cause if i do it means i lose everything everything i ever worked for my job my car my boy and i will b hopsitalized

so what do i do here guys we talked bout hoptial and therapy but we both know that wasof right now i cant afford it and both me and him agree what if i go to the hsoptail if i get admitted i will leave more fucked up theni went in so no hosptail

i would do therapy i really would just as of right now i cant affrod it im lookng hard for a new job with better insurance and even if its not better nsurance i would at least b making more money for i can afford the therapy

so right now i guess i just have to hang in there and just try not to lose my mind which im not doing good at right now i really am losing it if im at work im ok cause im busyand not worrying but once im home everything is just a fucking mess

so guys can u help me please neone who has been in recovery or in therapy or in hopsital residental or ip or even op cause u please give me some points and tips on how i can do this on my own how i can try and not compeltely lsoe my mind

Thursday, September 15, 2011


god so u guys hate me im such a bad blogger i know im sorry but im just working so much by the timei get home ijust wanna relax read watch tv do some crunches and thers not muvh to update its alwasy the same thing everyday work being tired dizzy not feeling well fighting with my head getting so tired after crunches i pass out waking up covered in sweat with my heart beating out of my chest its all the same and i dont wanna bore u guys

i have alot of pics for u guys um a sweater that i bought, a mug that im gonna buy, my jury duty outfit my outfit from last week

yup i said jury duty ugh i had to go on wednesday and miss part of work it sucked and my one manger was being a prick about it and he didint leave a note or tell the other managers so they were calling and i was like wtf but i called them back andd tol them and the nice manager was there so it all worked out. but i didnt even c the judge teh group that i was in was the plan b group so we were just in the jury assemlby room were we can use cells and read and even use laptop i didnt know that ori would of bought mine with me but i was there form 10-1230 i just curled up in the chair with my ipod and my book and no it wasnt a comfy chair but i curled up neway they had a lil room with coffee tea vending machine and soda machine everyone was eating im im sitting there just drinking my tea and water with my hands shaking and my head poudning but yeah we got released that wasmy jury duty tale but it sucks i misssed out on 3.5 hours of work i need that money i called when i was leaving and they let me come in and finish my shift and stupid me got lost tryingto get outo f belvidere yes mich i know ur prob gonna laugh at me but i coudltn for the life of me figure out how to to get back on to country road 519 ugh it was crazy adn my gps wasnt working stupid thing but i fianlly foudn it like getting there i was fine but there was a detour and idk i just dk what happend ha but once u geton 519 its just like a 35 min drive back to my town so yeah

but as soon as i got in i saw my amanger gave them my note i was still in my clohtes they are justlike poor dani and the schdule was all messed up cause of me and it wasnt even my fault but t hen the district manager comes in and who does she grill me me of all ppl it was ugh my mangers were like im sorry so sorry but u did good im like i jsut walked in the door

my sis's best friend who is family to us got ina car accidnt the other day some1 rearended her and shes 7 months pregnant they were having issues withthe heartbeat so they did an emerbecny c section but everyone is ok the baby is 2 months early but weighe din at 3 lbs 14 ounces shes so cute and tiny and a percious lil and shes doing better by the day thank god mom is ok shes sore and tired but ok my sis is coming home this wkd from school to b with her she got some1 to cover her friday shift for her at work at school and my bro went and got her after work for seh can spend the wkd with her friend

and u guys have no idea how cold i got today it was bad my hands were freezing and turning blue it was bad i was working of coures since hery its me im always working i was doing my nomral 10-6 shift and 2hoursin i coudlnt take it nemore

i had on jeans, converese, tank top, long sleeve shirt, tshirt, and then a zip up hoodie over top and i was still turning blue but hey i work at old navy so me being so cold and not being able to deal i bought a sweater i foudna clearnace one for $14 its black and white striped so yeah i bought that and put it on and no i ddint take nething else off i took my hoodie off put the sweater overeveyrthing else i had on already and then put my hoodie back on eveyrone was looking at me like im nuts but as soon as they fle tmy hands and how icey cold they were they were just like omg shocked

i dont think ppl understand how sick i am and how it affects my body is different ways u know like my moms friens will c me idk outside or walking or just getting in my car and they will tell my mom how i never look happy how im grumpy andshe just says shes sick shes never feleing good shes alwasy feeling bad

and i just wanna like yell like if u flet like i felt everyday how woudl u act u know

k pic time

my mug and my new hair i dyed it its black on top and red on the bottom the red is alot brighter then it shows int he pic o and the sweater i bought today

jury duty outfit

sat nite outfit we went and saw contagin we didnt go out to eat cause he said it was pointless to spend money on food that i cant eat and that if i do eat it its just gonna make me sick so yeah i started out withe boots on he liked the boots and the skirt he jsut didnt like the together if that makes ne sense so i cahanged to the flats

and idk know my weight can some1 pelase tell me how i look i fi look ok or gross or flat or huge ro do i still look the same 100 lbs self i was over a month ago idk

Thursday, September 8, 2011

egd test

ok so i know u guys wanna hear all about this and iw ill tell u everything i will even type out the pages he gave me well its page and half an dihave pics woo but idk if u guys wanna c those but i'll take a pic of the paper with my phone and post it just in case neone is curious.

ok so arrived at the place about 7am u cant eat or drink nething after midnite when u get this test its called an egd-"Esophagogastroduodenoscopy is an examination of the lining of the esophagus, stomach, and upper duodenum with a small camera (flexible endoscope) which is inserted down the throat."

i tihnk the doc was running late cause i didnt acutally get the test done til like 8:15am but its ok its been raining alot and things are flooding and roads are closed so its all good

but neway they take u back tot eh procedure room and first thing they do is make u pee in a cup(im not pregnant by the way not that i was worried but i guess thats what they are testing). they they brin gu over to the bed make u sign a consent from u have to wear a tshit i worse yoga pants converse thsirt and sweatshirt but took sweat shirt off then u get a gown to put on but as long as u wear a tshit u just put it over ur clohtes. they ask u alot an di mean alot of guestions wweight height surgreys kidney liver disease heart problems every question in the sun everything when the nurse asked my weight she guessed 92 but i said 100 cuase thats what i was last time i was weighed and height of 5'5 they were all concerened about my high blood perssure and cholestrol buts its genetic cant do nething about that she just told me to becareufl and watch for signs my temp was 99.5 even though i was freezing but they ask if ur ok ne pain discomfort all that they were all very nice and warm and welcoming made u feel right at home and at ease which is great i dont have many good experiences with nice ppl but i like it. they all kept telling me how tiny and small i was and young adn they werent use to young and so tiny ppl i just smiled im like yeah ok whatever u say but nething they put an iv oin ur rigth arm rigth by ur elbow they take ur blood pressure(which of course mine was high) and they put the heart monitor thing on ur one finger. since teh doc was running late they gave me 2 blankets since i was slo cold.

but they wheel u in the room with the assistant and drug lady that knocks u out they put the blood pressure back on and the finger heart monitor as well and they put 3 heart monitor stick pads one on ur right arm and then 2 on left arm and u hear ur heart beat well not really just the beep of the machine mine would b fine then get fast go back to fine fast again ha funny i know and u get oxygen in ur nose as well they ask u more and more questions too but when doc is ready u lay on ur left side and they put this yellow semi soft block behind u to stay in place and u have to bite on this thing it keeps ur mouth open then they give u drugs thats all i remember cuase ur not awake at all for the test but they put a long tube when camera on end down ur throat

but u wake up back in the nomral room and they gave me juice like 2 cups at least they were small ones i drank them u know i work up dizzy and shit u will b alil out of it and un steady for awhile but then the doc comes to talk to u gives u the papers and says what he finds and all that its not scary at all trust me.

he took alot of tissue samples though he said to try and rule out infection and malnoursihment wont find those results out for a week but i dont have ne ulcers so thats good but i need to have a disida scan with cck done they are thinkng like really thinking gallbladder disease and that test will show it i made an appt for that i got sept 19th at 7am its a 2 hour test hes pissed at my cardiologist though even though all my test for that came back clear hes still tihnking i should of been given a heart monitor so i guess when i c him again in 3 weeks we will talk about that he said if u get to dizzy still and fainting and palpiations i want u on that its so nice to have a doc that cares it really is.

the day of ur test ur not allowed to do nehting no driving for 24 hours, no making important decisions or sign papers for 24 hours, limit activites for 24 hours no sports heavy work or healvy lifting(they told me not to lift my cousins the lil ones i lifted them neway) but u can return to all the normal stuff the next day.

but as of right now im on a special diet have to stay away from fatty food ive been diangosed with gerd and mild esophagitis so yeah but now ima type out the forms they gave me afterwards and i will attach the pics as well if u dont like them sorry but figured some ppl woudl want to c them.

heres the forms then

the 25 year old women is undergoing upper endoscopy for assesment of abdominal pain, longstanding gerd and weight lose

physcial exam:
*vital signs- stable patient is afebrile
*lungs-clear to auscultation
*cardio-rate is regular rhytm is regular no heart mumur appreciated no clicks, gallors or rubs
*abdomen- is soft, nontender, and nondistended
*neuro-alert and oriented x3


egd with biopsy

cosent-wont type that out obv gave consent since had it done

technique- while in the left lateral decubitus position(laying on left side), the patient was adequatley sedated by the anesthesiologist. the scope was passed under direct visualization to the seond and third portion of the duodenum. upon with drawal of the scope, all of the walls of the uper intestinal trace were evaluated as well as possible. patient tolerated proceudre well and was tranferred to recovery area in stable condition.


*esophagus- mild esophagitis noted. lower esophagus is somewhat patulous(dk what that means need to google it) biopsies taken. no evidence of barrett's esophagus.
*antrum/angularies- erythema noted bioposies taken for evaluation of h. pylori
*body- mucosa appears normal
*retroflexion- cardia and fundus appeared normal
*pylorus- symmetric and easily entered
*duodenal bulb- within normal limits
*duodenum- 2nd portion of duodenum appeared within normal limits biopsies taken from third part of duodenum for evulation of villous atrophy and gluten enteropathy

*essentailly normal study
*antral erythema noted cannot rule out gastritis with h. pylori
8further evaluation will be needed to exclude biliary tract disease

*check biopsy
*continue reflux precautions and diet
*fruther evaluation will be done with disida scan w cck

yes i knwo half of that doesnt make snes but i figured u guys would b interesting neway they help u walk out like nurse holds u but really im so use to being dizzy that it wasnt nething new to meu know

k pics

Tuesday, September 6, 2011


im sorry im such a shitty blogger i really am and i hate that i need to post more for u guys i really do but ive been working so much and ive been sick on top of that

ive been working since last thrusday and i dont have off till this thursday and i only have off that day cause i have my egd test(scope of my stomach) but then i work friday and saturday and i dont have my scheudle for next week yet but im sure i will work sunday as well and i might have jury duty too next week ugh crazy life i know

idk how i worked thats how sick i was dizzy lightheaded nasoues barely able to stand coudlnt focus thrwoing up sneexing coughing lost voice runny stuffy nose sore throat it was a mess

i decided ima try and get better i cant do this nemore my health is shot my body is shutting down even if it doesnt show up on tests u just know that i was so sick and so unhealthy last week that the boy woudlnt even touch me and if he did like hug or hold me while i slept it was light like he was afriad he was gonna hurt me

so ima try and eat more and different thingfs even if my sotmach hates me like right now im eating grilled chicken salad with ceaser dressing, hot chicken, peppers, pickle chips, cucumber slices, tomatoes and oregano and its killing my stomach but ims o so so sick of eating rice all the time i just cant do it nemore so ima try and in october when c famly doc ima tell him about my headaches my racing thoughtsmy not sleeping mayb i can get soemthing to calm my head down for i can acutally focus

so i knw i have alot of blogs to catch up on my i jsut wanna lay down and watch some law and order svu so i will get caught up evenutallly i hope but im sure its alot to read and i will try to update more

here are some pics since i o u gusy some got 3 outfits for u its while i was sick and i swear my weight went up i look gross


friday(my worst sick down i could barely stand my coworkers hide me from managers looked out for them for i could sit as much as i could)

saturday( my fattest day look at me there gross we saw apollo 18 that nite i still dk what to make of tha movie)