3/27/10

so yesterday went ok i guess i went off my plan for during the day i had a banana and yogurt for breakfast lunch was celery and about 2 cups of popcorn after work i had 2 el fudge cookies dinner with the boy was at 9 at ntie after working 10 hour shift
he tried to get me to drink a beer with him and i refused and then he said well u cant just get water u gotta get soemthing else so i got a strawberry coco frost smoothie it was acutally really good. my meal was a paradise caribean salad(lettuce blackend chicken apples and oranges with vingar dressing) i ate all the apples oranges and a lil of the chicken. of course he made me get desert so i got a lil order of choc mouse it was ok i guess ugh idk.

but hes friends dont know bout my ed he doesnt want them to know or to judge me but i think hes one is catching on cause at dinner hes like what u dont eat ne of ur salad but u have dessert and i just looked at him. the boy goes she likes her dessert better then acutal meals he saved me. then hes friend islike staring at me while im trying to eat my dessert and im like no stop u cant look at me y im eating i dont like it and hes like what and im like icant eat if ustare at me. the boy saved me again and heslike really ucant look at her while she eats and then he started talking to him so i got to eat in privacy well sorta sicne we were at a restraurant.

so i havent been feeling well and u guys all know that they boy sees me and goes u dont look good and i tell him i havent been feeling well and my sytoms and hes like well whats wrong with u and i tell him idk but it sucks ugh o well

i just ate way tom uch and i hate myself i swear after easter is a new start and im getting all this fat ass weight thati was forced to gain off

love u all