Tuesday, June 28, 2011


im sorry that i dont have much to say lately idk ive just been surviving i guess and just getting thru my days
my emotions have been all over the place wrose then they have been in the past and it drives me nuts

went mini golfing with the boy and fried last nite i came in 2nd the winner gets free small italian ice the boy one soi got the italian ice it was tiedye it was yummy i like italian ice i can eat it with out getting a tummy ache i hate driving with him though cause i get nervous and anxious and it was nite time an di reallly dont like driving at nite either cause the headlights bother my eyes so i made a mistake and hit a bump lil to hard and he said i had to b more careful i had to pay more attenion whenim dirivn gi know imnot the best driver int he world but fuck ive never had a ticket or been in an accident tahts saying osemthing

had the kids today wow im beat those 3 just never slow down i nearly feel over halfway thru the day between the playing tag and hide and seek the walks the coloirng the just taking care of them i was beat love them though so its ok but the 5 yr old is starting to get an attitude and i dont like it where is the sweet girl that ive been babysitting since she was only a few months old i wont her back but i would still do nething for her and her brothers so but im trying to teach her patiance and sharing cause its ahrd she has 2 younger brothers so close in agei know its hard for her but still

but neway work tomm 10-6 thats gonna b tiring hopueflly i hear back about my car then as well i cant wait to have it

outfit and hair for the day the hair is just twistd back like a french bradi but instead of 3 strands its 2 the top half is pulled back rest is down and curly i hate my curly hair


black angel- thanx huin it means alot and yeah it is pretty isnt it

bones-i know i needed soemthing to work out for once. i alwasy underestmamte myself an di alwasy think i will fail so im like setting myself up for failure right from the beginning its hard to change that way of thinking

skinnygirl-yeah ur right im not proana yes i suffer from an ed but i woudlnt wish it on my wrost enemy thanx for ur number hun i will have to remember it when im having a really bad day

scared blogger-i missed u too u have to tell me all about france

barbies and bones- thanx hun i keep hearing the itny comment alot more lately but i dont c it i dont think im that small i sitll need to lose like 10-15 lbs

mich- yeah ur blonde i was blonde in high school my hair is dark now yay for adventure unfortunally i work all wkd gotta love retail ugh but thanx we will ahve to get together at some point if u want that is o i alwasy wanna bash other ppls head into a wall cause they drive me fucking nuts. i think we are just both slightly crazy then mich mayb next year i can get my vacation if i don tlose it by then. c at least u have a slight clue as of when urs started i dont i never like the mirrors i never like whati c its so fucking ridc i just wanna b happy but that will never happen

needlesedge-thanx mark

samzi- thanx hun just waitng for the call

desesperee- lol thanx hun u really dont have to send me nething im not wroth the time and effort but thanx

aly- sorry that u had a mini relpase there hun take care of urself ok

sarah-thanx hun i wish i woudl feel better too but i doubt i ever will

amy marie-my mind is constanly going just never stops alwasy racing with all the thoughts its draining

ivy- i sitll dk what normal is and like i said how can i know when all i know isnt normal at all guess we just have to keep fighting for what we want and hope it all works out in the end


  1. Oh, driving anxiety... I remember white-knuckling it every time I drove H somewhere. Thank god I've turned into a cycling hippie without a car! Your life sounds exhausting right now... I hope you get to relax soon!

  2. Never say never, pretty girl. You'll find happiness.

    Your hair looks pretty awesome. <3

    Yeah we'll definitely have to plan an adventure at some point. :D There's too much weird sh*t in NJ and PA to NOT explore it....

    I left you an award! xoxo