Monday, August 30, 2010


so i made some more computer backgrounds over the past couple of days here they are:

ok and since ima dork and idk what to do with myself i did some research. c i suually work monday monrings but since he cup my hours im workinf 4-8 tonite and idk what to do with myself im not use to having my morinngs but neway i did research on the sypmtoms of different things. like depression anxiety panick attaskcs u know so here is what i did:

o Palpitations, pounding heart, or accelerated heart rate
• Sweating
• Trembling or shaking
• Sensations of shortness of breath or smothering
• Feeling of choking
• Chest pain or discomfort
• Nausea or abdominal distress
• Feeling dizzy, unsteady, lightheaded, or faint
• Derealization (feelings of unreality) or depersonalization (being detached from oneself)
• Fear of losing control or going crazy
• Fear of dying
• Paresthesias (numbness or tingling sensations)
• Chills or hot flushes

• Difficulty breathing.
• Pounding heart or chest pain.
• Intense feeling of terror.
• Sensation of choking or smothering.
• Dizziness or feeling faint.
• Trembling or shaking.
• Sweating
• Nausea or stomachache.
• Tingling or numbness in the fingers and toes.
• Chills or hot flashes.
• A fear that you are losing control or are about to die.

• Having persistent but unreasonable fear of a situation that involves unfamiliar people or being judged by others. The fear is that you will be embarrassed or humiliated by something that you say or do.
• Developing severe anxiety or panic attacks when in the feared situation.
• Recognizing that your fears are excessive or unreasonable.
• Avoiding social situations that you fear or enduring them with intense anxiety or distress.
• Avoiding or anxiously anticipating feared situations so much it interferes with daily activities and relationships.
• Worrying about being anxious

• Constant worrying or obsession about small or large concerns
• Restlessness and feeling keyed up or on edge
• Fatigue
• Difficulty concentrating or your mind "going blank"
• Irritability
• Muscle tension or muscle aches
• Trembling, feeling twitchy or being easily startled
• Trouble sleeping
• Sweating, nausea or diarrhea
• Shortness of breath or rapid heartbeat

• difficulty concentrating, remembering details, and making decisions
• fatigue and decreased energy
• feelings of guilt, worthlessness, and/or helplessness
• feelings of hopelessness and/or pessimism
• insomnia, early-morning wakefulness, or excessive sleeping
• irritability, restlessness
• loss of interest in activities or hobbies once pleasurable, including sex
• overeating or appetite loss
• persistent aches or pains, headaches, cramps, or digestive problems that do not ease even with treatment
• persistent sad, anxious, or "empty" feelings
• thoughts of suicide, suicide attempts

like i said im a ddork and i like my research i really wanna get help well medication for my panick attacks and anxiety and paranoia and depression but i kno wi cant just get away with that with out revealing my ed. yes i know i said i hwatned help and i do but my doc is a complele clueless assfuck so yeah im not gonna out myself and have him judge me more cause he thinks im fine when the scale says 105 they say good yup good so whatever.

idk if ima get on later since the boy is on vacation this week so we are spending every nite together

food log so far:
*choc chips-70
*small banana-75
*1/2 cup blueberries-40

* 3 cups hot tea(1 is sitting inforn of me know)
*bottle of water
*liter of water(sitting in front of me too)
*bottle mixed berry diet green tea
*medium unsweetned dd iced tea(sitting her as well)

*65 min elly level 10 kilamagro kill workout- 536 cals burnt

so i paln on making myself a nice salad b4 i go to work and then not eating the rest of the nite but sometimes the boy makes me eat so we will c how that goes

love u all


  1. Cute backgrounds!
    And your research is totally impressive. <3

  2. I love the shoe background!

    And I don't think you're a dork at all. It's good to know those things, especially if you think you suffer from any of them. I had a panic attack at 3 AM last night. At the time, I totally thought I was dying, but I was scared to wake anyone up. I get those a lot... And I know the symptoms, but I still think I'm dying every time.


  3. u guys can use ne of the background u want
    and if u want em to maek u one just aski dont mind

    i love reserach and im gald u guys liked it