Wednesday, September 29, 2010


me and dairy are having a really bad fight right now it really really doesnt like me nemore and im not gonna put myself thru that pain and sickness and nasousa nemore so me and dairy are just done.

i tried having some choc today just cause ihad a craving and i didnt want it to lead to a binge so i let myself have some and that stops me from binging and it did but the pain after wasnt fun at all.

my stomach hurt so bad so so so bad u ahve no idea and i ended up having like 3 BM and then add inthe chest pains the acid refulx and the need to puke all day. i didnt acutally puke but i felt like i was going to i was nasouses off and on all day and it made me not want to eat which is fine with me but i had do eat eventually cause i was getting so tired and weak an di need to job searched so i forced a lil dinner down my throat and now my stomach hruts again and it wasnt even ne dairy but it hurts so bad and its so bloated and ugh fuck i hate my life
its always soemthing with me between stomach issues and heart issues im just a mess

i was going to go tot he gym this morning but my uncle said that he was gonna come over and pick up my application for a job at hes work and talk to hes boss yeah needless to say he never caem so by 1230pm my mom just said to go and if he came she would give it to him

so instead of going to the gym i went to the park and ran. our park twice around is a mile and i ran it 6 times so i ran 3 miles by the last lap i my eyes were starting to go blurry but i pushed thru :) and alway the last lil park i sprint and thats what i did even though my legs felt like jello but i did it.
then i walked 2 laps around to calm my heart down

and since i was at the park and i cant resist the swings i went and swinged for a lil while about 20 minutes i was starting to get really nasouses again soi just sat there for awhile there was barely neone at the park and i was enjoying the quiteiness and the peacefullness andi j ust let my mind wonder it was nice for awhile until i started feeling really sick soi deicded that i needed to get home

food log
*small slice apple pie-100



*2 small tomatoes cut up with garlic powder-30
*2 slices whole wheat toast-180

*2 liters water
*cup of hot orane caffeine free tea
*cup of hot choc-65

*ran 3 miles-240 cals burned
*1 hour joggin in place-374 cals burned

i wanted to thank u all once again u really are all amazing and ur my best friends that i never had. we are all here for each other and we all understand what each other is going through love u all and stay strong


  1. im so sorry! they make dairy free vegan chocolate, ive seen it at walmart and im sure they have at target!

  2. wow, you have a lot of willpower!
    i am jealous.
    but dont hurt yourself too much, hun.

  3. Darn dairy :| I hope you feel better soon.

  4. Ahh, that sucks about the dairy!
    Stay gorgeous.

  5. Ah good job at the park! That sounds fun. Swinging seems like a goo way to exercise. :P

    I have similar problems with dairy. Maybe it's good that you're ruling it out, since it's fattening anyway, but if you actually want to be able to have it sometimes, you can take something like Lactaid. When your body doesn't tolerate dairy (and therefore lactose), it's because your body doesn't have enough lacTASE. You can supplement your diet with a lactase supplement, thereby being able to digest dairy.


  6. sucks about the dairy, but maybe it'd be better to just cut it out completely? dairy is usually really fatty, and if it makes you sick that's a perfect excuse not to eat it!

    and great job with the exercise! good for you for pushing through!